Got what it takes on the field??
Posted on 08. May, 2011 by Commissioner in Congressional Women's Game, Sponsors, Talk Smack, Dude
In last year's tournament, Commissioner Caruso hits a stand-up double proving slow, old players can still hit!
Here is the post to begin the smack of the season.
During last year’s tournament, Commissioner Caruso proves that despite age, extra pounds and a loss of his former quickness, even he can still hit a double past the left fielder.
So what have you done on the field against all odds??
30 Responses to “Got what it takes on the field??”
Leave a Reply
Get updates in real time!
The Troll
16. Aug, 2011
Hey Commish….you gonna send the rosters out to the captains? At the very least you need to send your teams’ roster out. No more last minute Craigslist roster changes like last year. Can’t believe you cheated in your own league. The troll is watching you.
Commissioner
16. Aug, 2011
If you recall, we did not have a July roster cut-off last year. My roster has 35 players on it this year…come by Saturday and ask to see any roster.
Now shouldn’t you not post from the FDIC web server during business hours?
Actually, the Commissioner is the one watching you, Mr. Troll!
The troll
23. Aug, 2011
Wow, Balco advances with two forfeit victories. They must have been thrilled. Could this spell the end of the csl playoffs as we know it? Without Balco and the showboats next year, who’s left to give the league any legitimacy?
The Troll
18. Jul, 2011
Yes, the Troll has returned. The Troll takes no prisoners whe it comes to softball smack talk. Forget about cancellations. That’s just a Potemkin Village for the real scandel in the CSL. The BALCO championship was a fraud. They brought ringers from a House league team who were defeated earlier in the day; one of the key players was not on the 25 team roster as required by league rules. Not only was it a bush league move, but it was downright cheating. There were other shannigans they were playing, like running out the clock when they had leads. If Gary had any balls, he would ban them from this year’s tournament.
Commissioner
19. Jul, 2011
If someone challenges a roster during the tournament, we will check the players. Our participation restrictions apply to playing on one CSL team only during the entire tournament and limiting each CSL team to no more than 3 players from other Hill teams per CSL team. If they had more than 3, they would be in violation. Is this another USC championship scandal about to unfold?
Mitchell Report
19. Jul, 2011
I heard Gingersnap pays some of the BALCO players. Those guys be breaking bread http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i69nKApq60k.
Skip
19. Jul, 2011
Gary, you will only uncover a BALCO scandal if you drug test us.
As for you Troll, two of our starting outfielders did play for Big Lebowskis in the House tournament. Its not a secret that we have some overlap with that team. Both of those “ringers” were rostered and are regular members of BALCO. And we will do that again this year as the rules allow for it. Anyone who thinks we juice up for the tournament is right: we juice up year round (have you seen the arms on the Dude?). But Troll, I have to wonder why you’re surprised that a team with 3 regular season losses in over 50 regular season games the last 3 years could win the league tournament. Is it that we bested you and your mysterious players wearing four different colored jerseys? With those balls flying over the fence off your Ultra 2 bats?
The Troll
20. Jul, 2011
Skip, you failed to mention your early departure from the 2009 tourney when you were smacked around by Raising AZ and half your team went home crying and complaining.
Skip
20. Jul, 2011
You mean our 8-7 walkoff loss to the two-time defending champs No Talent AZ Clowns? And actually, half the team was not crying and complaining. It was the entire team. Get your facts straight Troll.
Troll sweats BALCO
20. Jul, 2011
Troll is a fitting name considering his physical appearance and his tendency to dwell in myth. BALCO really doesn’t care much about the troll or his mediocre teams… or even his bitterness about his losses in cong tourney play.
The fact that he thinks our legal BL players are “ringers” tells us everything we need to know- the troll is just making assumptions from his outpost under the bridge leading to another embarrassing tourney exit.
Troll- go ahead, what else do you have for us today? What other secrets are you going to uncover? I’m actually kind of entertained. Sore losers are fun to have around, it just makes us look that much better (not that we’ve really ever cared how we looked, obviously).
The Dude
24. Jul, 2011
Its time for The Dude to way in on this fool, aka The Troll. You sound like a jealous spoiled grapes loser. AZ Clowns were a worthy opponent and 2 Time Champion of this league, no shame in losing to them – there’s no crying in softball you clown. That Beltway Ballers team we took 2 of 3 from was a great tourney team. Gary runs an excellent tourney, we’re proud to be a tiny slice of a long and storied tradition That is The Congressional Softball League. You can cower in anonymity but know this, Balco won the league on the up and up, with talent not ringers you slanderous buffoon. We’ll do it again this year if the softball gods will smile down on us once more. We’ll wave goodbye to you when you head back to your car for the long drive back to The Troll Sewer from which you crawled out after 2 quick losses. The Dude Abides.
The Troll
26. Jul, 2011
Dude, don’t you think it’s time to grow up a little bit? The reality is that pretty much any rural/suburban industrial league team in the US would destroy the CSL or House teams. Running around with you chest out spouting about how proud you are to be a slice of the CSL is a little ridiculus.
Coach Bellachick
14. Jul, 2011
Type your comment here…
Coach
14. Jul, 2011
What’s up with all the cancellations this year?? Come on Captains you set a schedule in early April honor it why don’t ya! Probably the same teams that are running up scores, dancing in the outfield and just acting like general d-bags, we’ll see how well you fair come tournament time.
The Truth
15. Jul, 2011
These are just rookie teams thinking they’re hot shit because they beat Little Sisters of the Poor and the Depends Brothers by a few runs. Like you say Coach, these teams will go out early in the playoffs. Or the regular season for that matter if they get a date with a team like BALCO or Showboats.
Coach
15. Jul, 2011
Truer words were never spoken Mr. Truth (pun intended) the cream of the crop with rise in Sept. the d-bags will sink to the bottom where they belong, in the mean time, sadly we’ll all have to put up with the classless d-bags. Shout out to all you d-bag captains, we know who you are and are laughing behind your ego inflated d-bag asses.
Shut up Already
18. Jul, 2011
You really need to work on your shit talking and learn some synonyms for d-bags. And really, just entirely too aggressive. You would make a Thursday evening of drinking beers and stumbling around the bases completely not enjoyable. Seems like you must have been that kid cut from his little league T-ball team to take something so casual so seriously. No wonder why people have canceled against you.
Ace of Base Hits
07. Jul, 2011
Which team in the league has the finest females? Two categories: I’m talking both as players and lookers. Let’s go around the horn here.
Commissioner
07. Jul, 2011
So should a right field swinger…Ace of Third Base…ask which teams have the best studs in both categories too??
Ace of Base Hits
07. Jul, 2011
For my money its Joey S from the Brookland Sluggers, followed closely by Steve from No Talent AZ Clowns. I guess we also shouldn’t forget about the doe-eyed Alex from Colvin’s Cannons.
Hoping for a Win
07. Jul, 2011
I like the guy who wears the Colts hat from Yellow Journalists. Also the captain of the Capitol Hemp One Hitters. In terms of talent, that guy who always goes sleeveless for BALCO can play. He’s also really hot.
Put.It.In.Coach
07. Jul, 2011
Absolutely the captain of the AZ Clowns, he is the dreamiest creamiest steamiest player on the field. They left this league for what they thought were greener pastures (aka a mediocre record in the House league), but I have a feeling they may be back at some point. I think most of us are more focused on the hottest dudes in this league. The girls are just not doing it for me anymore- prob cause the AZ clowns captain literally just turned me Bi, maybe even full blown ghey.
Hot Potato
07. Jul, 2011
Can someone weigh in on a squatting etiquette interpretation? Last night, my team was playing near the monument, on a rectangular plot of land that can safely host 4 games, with one home plate in each of the four corners. Four teams showed up between 1 and 3 pm to reserve those fields. At 4:45 by his account, 5:15 by ours, the Dodgers captain showed up and set up a fifth field. The surrounding games didn’t think it was safe, with too much overlap, and we asked him to move. Sure enough, there were a lot of balls going into each other’s respective infields, and outfielders from both games were watching the other game between pitches to ensure their safety. What do you do in a situation like that where a squatter clearly shows up too late to get a field and carves out a makeshift field from the outfields of the games around him? Does he have the right to do that? Even if not, what is the protocol for removing his game when he refuses to leave? Does the league have any jurisdiction here?
Fine Breeding
07. Jul, 2011
It seems kinda dick, but in terms of safety, I don’t think it matters. The league’s insurance policy would cover any injuries that would result from that kind of situation.
Commissioner
07. Jul, 2011
We don’t want to encourage injury…and the policy has a $500 deductible, so that’s a lot of cash out of pocket as well.
Commissioner
07. Jul, 2011
Unless a team has a permit for a specific patch of ground, at which time you can get a park ranger or park police officer to move the offenders, teams can be dicks and stay overlapped until someone moves or gets hurt. Can’t really do anything.
The Dude
24. Jul, 2011
We had the same issue with The Dodgers. I played them a week later and they were a very nice group of folks, but I think setting up at 515pm hitting bombs onto someone’s infield is a huge break from the DC wide adopted protocol. Some dude sweated his balls off to hold a field from 1pm, showing up at 515 on a non field carving up someone else’s field is among the worst things I have seen in my many years of DC softball. Fortunately they are otherwise a good group of people, but its dangerous, disrespectful and downright undude.
Skip#3
06. Jul, 2011
To answer Gary’s question, “So what have you done on the field against all odds??”, I will simply say this- Against all odds, I have refrained from going postal at several games due to intentionally botched (or inept) pitching.
If teams can’t win fair and square, and believe me, lots of them in this league can’t, they resort to low brow tactics like pitching around batters or simply cheating. The pitching around batters (or purposefully putting their 4x high school chess champion or resident coffee shop mac-book poet on the mound) is really just annoying. Our players will wait…. we will wait for your player to make a mistake and throw a strike.
You can then complain if our players will make you repeatedly throw strikes before swinging, but that’s simply because you were a d-bag to begin with. We will then run up the score on you, and probably attempt to score with your women while we’re at it. Maybe one of our sweet bros will take home that 19 year-old intern you put on the mound intentionally, who hasn’t played a game on a diamond since tee-ball.
Commissioner
06. Jul, 2011
Since the league is more casual than not, competitive teams need to propose a few rules (like assuring their opposing pitcher delivers hittable pitches or the batter can walk after say 5 unhittable pitches) that both captains agree upon prior to the start of the game….and conversely, more casual teams can relax strikeout rules for their part for their weak batters. But if the captains don’t agree on a set of game parameters, your only strikeouts will surely come from your hits on the interns!
Skip
05. Jul, 2011
What’s with teams throwing out bogus pitchers? So far this year we’ve faced three pitchers either unwilling or unable to throw strikes. While I won’t call out the pitcher unable to throw strikes (as the unfunny joke his team plays on him weekly is punishment enough), here’s looking at your Alphabet Soup and Fallen Angels. Why can your pitcher throw five perfect arcing strikes in warm-ups then not one in ten pitches to our cleanup hitter? Why then do you complain about our players taking pitches when the strike mat, that you insisted on using, is getting less action than Gary on a singles cruise? Shut up and throw strikes. We won’t chase.